The Vision . . .

A Child's Heart began 21 years ago as a vision of Jackie Cotton, a never-married woman raising her then seven-year-old son: She saw a party in her back yard with children running and playing in the grass, adults talking on the deck…then all disappeared; in the quiet, she heard crying. Looking for the crying, she looked under the deck and saw three little boys, one Black, one White, and one Hispanic. The burden in her heart was so heavy that tears were forming in her eyes and the urge to find out about these children and the meaning was powerful. As she sought God in His Word for the meaning of this dream, Psalm 27:10 came and planted itself in her heart: “Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close.” She knew that is how her son felt, along with many others around the world.

Her heart heard:
“They need to be brought out from under the deck, cleaned off, and told I love them, because the church and society are walking above them on top of the deck, unaware of their broken-hearted feeling of abandonment.”

The History of A Child’s Heart . . .

• Incorporated as a non-profit in 1992
• Through ca. 1997, “Street League,” a sports-based Child’s Heart-conceived outreach to children and youth from broken homes, was offered by various churches in Colorado Springs and Denver, as well as by Salvation Army
• Between 1998 and 1999, A Child’s Heart (ACH) formed a curriculum team and began work on adapting Skills for Living’s “Building Healthy Relationships in an unhealthy world” for elementary school-age children
• Since the summer of 2002
  • ACH has pilot-tested the children’s material with foster children and children of single mothers via summer day camps (“Camp Nehemiah”);
  • Family Life Services also has used this material after it was pilot-tested
• Since 2006
• ACH has begun work on adapting the material for teenagers and for parents for use in whole-family enrichment series

The ACH Purpose...

Our purpose is to assist the Church in bringing the single-parent family, blended family, grandparents raising grandchildren. foster families units and adults who wish to walk into the healing work of God’s Spirit, as stated in Luke 4:18-19 by the Lord Jesus Christ. This involves growth in understanding and healing through a process that builds on regular, weekly fellowship and Biblical instruction—topical instruction geared to help all age levels in the family know God’s plan for wholesome relationships with Himself and others. Fellowship each week may involve an active sport or games and the sharing of food.  Talking with others who are feeling the same pain is part of the healing of the whole person.

Tasks...

We see our role through the analogy of Nehemiah; that is, we come alongside church congregations to equip them to reach those in their membership and in their broader community who need to rebuild their lives after experiencing brokenness within their families.

We therefore partner with churches by providing them with age-appropriate topical Bible study materials and sports-based or classroom-based relationship-building programs that speak to the unique needs of the family structure that has been severed, and by training and supporting congregations in their implementation of these kinds of outreach ministries.  We also endeavor to facilitate partnerships and collaboration between church bodies in reaching those affected by broken family structures.

The Why, What, and How...

Why the concern for children and youth growing up without both natural parents in the home?

We all learn the basics about life, God, and relationships within our families, first—as God designed to be the case (e.g., Deut. 11:18-21; Proverbs 22:6; Ephesians 6:4). When childhood and adolescent experiences in the family do not unfold as God intended them to, it can fracture the developing child’s sense of God, self, and others.

Specifically, the absence of a natural parent in the home, as well as experiencing multiple parental changes (e.g., parental divorce, parental incarceration, addition of a step-parent, foster-care placement) can increase the risk of later problems, including:

• suicidal ideation and attempts
• mental and substance use disorders
• delinquency and criminal offending
• school failure
• risky sexual behavior and becoming a teenaged parent
• becoming divorced, themselves

Note also that our concepts of God are related to our concepts of our parents: if children experience abuse, abandonment, or betrayal at the hands of their parents, they will likely experience greater difficulties in their relationship with God.

My/our children seem fine—what’s the big deal? Aren’t these concerns just for a minority of kids?

Yes, for most of the major problems listed above, only a minority of children from broken family structures will experience them. HOWEVER, virtually ALL children growing up with these kinds of family situations suffer from feelings of loss, anger, and sadness, which themselves are worthy to be addressed—and, which can increase their risk for other problems.

Furthermore, some problems, such as their own divorce, may not surface for many years. That is, children and youth may look “fine” for a time, as far as effects of having grown up without one or either of their natural parents, but may then start to experience problems in their relationships or with life satisfaction years later.

The real question therefore is:
Why NOT invest in our children’s health and well-being from the beginning? Why wait until we see problems starting to arise?

Why be content to invest nothing and let our children simply seem free of major problems?—why not give them everything we can for them to grow into strong, loving, healthy and happy adults?

Why the concern for adults who have been affected by a broken family structure?

For adults who experienced childhood wounds around these family situations, they may find themselves facing such challenges such as:

• their own divorce
• abusive or unfulfilling and dysfunctional romantic relationships
• the long-term negative consequences of choices (e.g., around school failure or risky sex) they made in anger or hurt years prior when they were reacting to their family pain

For single parents, they may find themselves facing challenges such as:

• financial woes and child care woes
• loneliness and lack of support
• lack of energy and time to be with their children
• dealing with angry, hurting, and hurtful children without the support of the other parent

For step parents, they may find themselves facing challenges such as:

• having to forge bonds with children and teens who may not want the step parent to be in their life
• having to deal with their spouse’s ex-partner, including, around conflicts of loyalty and responsibility regarding the children
• parenting children without having any legal rights
• forging a family unit from separate elements (especially the case with step- and half-siblings involved)

For foster and adoptive parents, they may find themselves facing challenges such as:

• parenting children with severe psychological wounds, with accompanying behavior problems that may be very difficult and disruptive
• having to balance the needs of their foster children and those of their natural children
• having disruptions in their bonds with their children via their visits to natural parents or changes in custody

What can be done to help equip these children and families for a Godly, healthy life?

• provide tangible and emotional support and encouragement on a weekly basis
• provide mentoring (of the children and parents)
• provide opportunities to practice and experience positive ways of interacting with others
• provide Scriptural teaching directed specifically at the issues they face (e.g., trust, anger, abandonment, forgiveness, grief, guilt and shame, God’s purpose for family, loving vs. unloving relationships, etc.)
• provide a community of those who understand and have been through similar experiences

How can this be done?

• Please see the Programs section.